I have been thinking about reading tarot and how unique it is to everyone, yet there is something almost every reader I have came across seem to have in common. The cards are rude to them and “drag them” while being more gentle on other people. An example of this would be the cards telling you that you are a mess and you got to get yourself together before you can be successful, but the deck would tell a client that they are well on their way but just need a push before they can go forward. This post is to tell you the reason this is the case is that you are just mean to yourself, and you do not want to be mean to this other person.
A tarot reading is like a game of mad libs. Your questions are your phrases and the answer is the verb, noun, adjective, or so on that we fill in the blanks. The cards are the certain guidelines the blank requires you to follow so the story makes sense. Now, you can take these blanks and purposefully make them super dry, funny, creative, or however else you want. The same goes for the reading. However, now you must be thinking “It isn’t my fault that I got a negative card!” You’re right, you are not to blame for the card, but you are to blame for the way the card is read.
The card in your reading is, let us say, the 10 of swords. I can already hear the discomfort that brings. If this came up in your reading, you would probably be discouraged, upset, annoyed, or maybe you would put the card back and try again (don’t you lie– I know you do it!). However, if this card was drawn for the same question, same position, but different person, your interpretation would most likely be very different. Instead of this huge negative impact this card would have on your reading, this card would have a more gentle message. The message may not be “everything is great and dandy and you got nothing to worry about” but it would sure be nicer than “this is all your fault and life just sucks for you right now doesn’t it haha not like I care about you and your well being!”
Maybe that last line was an exaggeration, maybe it wasn’t, point is that you got to be nicer to yourself. If this were a mad lib, and the blank asked for a word to describe what the 10 of swords represented, you could have gone with drained or hurt, but instead went with defeated, given up, all of these more negative terms. If the story calls for a negative term, word, or phrase that does not mean that you need to give it a mean term, word or phrase. However, I also notice that the same goes for the really positive cards. It is almost like some people see a positive card and get skeptical of it or downplay it some will even go as far as to say “enjoy the good while it lasts” which would imply that negative times are on the way.
This simple act may get some laughs or likes or notes or whatever- but this is something we really need to look into and tackle. Of course, I am not going to be the person who will tell you your interpretation is wrong- but if it is mean, why not be kinder? Tough love can help but people seem to be leaving out the love in their readings when it is for themselves. Here are some ways to be kinder to yourself while you are reading your own cards- as well as ways to make divination part of your self-care!
Take Your Time
This can be a difficult one for sure. When you read the cards for someone else you tend to go into so much detail- but when you read for yourself sometimes you look at the cards- take a note on the key words for the card- then go “Ah, okay. finished.” which meant you took less than let us say, 5 minutes on that reading. Stop it. More importantly, stop. By stopping in order to take the time to treat your reading properly by giving it the time and attention it deserves, not only are you allowing yourself to get a more clear message but you are also showing yourself respect. Imagine how disrespected a customer would be if you just glanced at the cards and said “okay here it is” and give them one or two sentences. Don’t put that on yourself. You deserve better.
I find writing it down helps you put more effort into the reading. When you look at the page and see only three lines, it kind of motivates you to keep going. I would recommend four to five sentences as long as they are not short ones. Take your time with it.
Meditate On It
Instead of having the cards only answer questions, why not let the cards ask you some? At the end of the day, shuffle and pick a card at random and turn that card into a question. Write the question down and take a few moments to really meditate on it. Now, take your time to answer it. If turning the cards into a question is difficult for you, you can also try asking the cards to point out a part of your day that you should sit with and meditate on. When you see the card- what part of the day do you automatically go to? Maybe the deck is talking about something you wish happened but didn’t. Either way, think about it and meditate on it. The goal is to be thankful for whatever outcome has happened and to leave no ill feelings behind so you can end your day on a positive note.
By doing this, not only are you bonding with the deck at hand but you will also begin to further understand the message the card brings. You may be thinking “but Crescent, the deck asked ME the question, what message could there possibly be?” The message would be why they asked that question. When you ask someone a question it is for a reason. Normally it is so you can get an answer- but I believe the deck knows the answer. So what is another reason you ask a question? You can ask questions to not only see if they know the answer- but to get them thinking on the topic. The deck asking you a question is helping you put the pieces together. Why is the deck bringing it up? Figure it out, but stay positive about the outcome.
You’re Great! Here Is Why
Sometimes you just need a boost in confidence. It is always nice to get compliments, and asking your deck for one now and then can be good for you. The important thing is to keep the context in mind- these are all compliments so look at all cards as such, even the ‘negative’ ones. If you ask your deck for a compliment and you pull the Three of Swords, the deck may be saying it admires how strong you have been no matter how much pain and heartache you go through- what a nice thing to say!
Also, this is a good example to try to find the positive in every card. You cannot stop the deck from giving you the tower card, but you can change your perception of the card. The cards in this reading should all be positive- they are compliments to you! Think of the cards as a coin- every card has a negative and positive side- so focus on the positive side this reading! Also, by hearing all the nice things your deck has to say about you- maybe you’ll get yourself out of the mindset that your deck hates you and wants to hurt your feelings.